Perfectly flawed

Kiss the Son

We've almost arrived in the new year and I'm still maneuvering this wilderness called Philadelphia. I knew that's what He meant when He said, "come away with Me... Come into the wilderness.." but who can really prepare themselves to be unaffected by such a change? I went from being surrounded by my friends and family every day to waking up alone and facing this journey on my own (humanly speaking). So here I am... and I'm finding my heart lunging in every direction for some shred of comfort for my soul. It's as if I've devised a plan to remain elusive from my own grief; hiding on the surface of survival. Maybe if I avoid those dark depths for long enough the pain will just cease and I won't have to go there after all.
So suddenly I'm not only just painting pictures of Egypt, longing to go back, but recreating Egypt in my daily life and modeling my surroundings as such. Ah, the layers of deceptive idolatry... promises of comfort... promises of safety... the seductive idea that I don't really have to do this. He doesn't really want me to be in discomfort, does He?
And then I hear a still small voice whisper, "Beloved, come and die..."
It's me. I'm that sacrifice that's desperately trying to crawl off of the altar. Pleading with Him to just let me go around this mountain. Begging to negotiate something just a bit less painful. How swiftly my heart becomes cowardly when death is my portion... I clearly see why He's brought me here.
And so, I begrudgingly pull my writhing soul back onto this altar. As if fighting with Him gets me anywhere anyway.

Uncle.

Matt & Monica

 

 

 

 



 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 



 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

Receiving the Ghost- M Room show 2.22.09

Well I'm finally putting some pictures up... Ha.

This batch of photographs are from Receiving the Ghost's show at the M Room in Philly... If you don't know who Receiving the Ghost is, then now is the time to find out! Here is their Myspace page- http://www.myspace.com/receivingtheghost, and here is their Facebook page- http://www.facebook.com/pages/Receiving-the-Ghost/38648318970.

Enough talk.









































Hope you enjoyed!

Remember

On the other side of the absence of light,

the edges of a dream lightly brush my face,

creating a shock of color forgotten too soon.

Fragments of hope still cling so desperately to the small source of sorrow within,

willing the silence away,

releasing the unseen song to surge through layers of disappointment,

to find the once faith filled heart and and sing over it

till rhythm is remembered .

Christina's day full of birthday surprises... Pt. 1

So these are some pictures from last Friday when I took Christina to South Street in Philly for the day as a surprise. This is only some of the pictures...

[gallery]

Hope you enjoyed! I have quite alot more, so I'll continue in another post...

Keep me...

Slowly, it happened...

Darkness discovered me...

I thought I knew where Your hand was, but somehow my fingers had slipped from certainty to the thickness of this silent void...

Your whispers seemed lost in layers of fear as confusions despair held the very breath within me...

My heart is being ripped by surrender, as that which trust attached itself to is now just another torn edge...

Look upon me for a moment, tell me what You see...

Do You see me as the puzzle I am, my pieces so misunderstood as they lay in disarray?

Do You hear the pounding and pulsing of the aches which are past the point of expression?  

Do You feel the movements of my heart as it grapples with the reality of stepping into undefinable pain, excepting the position of waiting?

This is where I am...

Words can barely express the colorless fragments that seem to be the only reflection I see...

Only moments laced with hope hold me now...

Only Your face...

Knowing that somehow I will behold Your gaze...

Keep me...